working by myself was a pretty brutal experience. It taught me a lot about myself. It taught me that there’s certain things that I just don’t like, you know? Um, I don’t really like - I’m - I’m not much of a craftsman when it comes to game development; I just learned, right?
Like, I just don’t have patience for the technical tasks that require a lot of patience and an ability to sit in front of a computer screen for many, many hours. Um, I - it just really drove me up the wall. It made me really, really uncomfortable. And - and there’s a reality that you have to be able to do that if you want to work in video games because that’s where the games exist, you know? They exist in your screen. And - but once - but I - you know, I enjoyed the design. I enjoyed the design. I enjoyed having to step away from the game and to process it and to come up with interesting, creative, like narrative solutions and to try and - to try and articulate those as best I could. Um, but as soon as I sat down to actually build it I just - my body just drained. It was like just sucked out through my stomach and I just - I hate it. I didn’t like myself. I was unhappy. Um, and - and after the mod came out I figured I was never going to work on another game again because I just really didn’t enjoy it. And then suddenly people started coming to me and saying, “Hey, you know all of that tedious work that you really don’t enjoy doing? I love doing that. Let me do it for you.” And I was like, “Really? You do? You want to do that?” um, but they did - and people do. There are, like - there are people who really enjoy that. There are people who love coding. There are people who love, like, building out a - an environment, you know? Like cr - designing and - and - and creating a level in a game, um, which, you know, things that I kind of - I can touch on and do to some extent and I get - I get an amount of - of joy out of but, um - some, but I can’t do it by myself. And not to mention as soon as I was - started working with William who’s the - the other designer on Stanley Parable it was like I had someone to bounce ideas off of; I had someone just to talk to and to communicate with.
